What You don’t See On Social Media

I think we can all agree that social media has somehow altered our vision of reality. Who of us here haven’t been affected in some way or another by social media? Looking at someone’s feed (a travel blogger for example) can make us somewhat envious of their lifestyle. That’s an even bigger issue when it comes to body confidence.

The gorgeous Amelia Liana (find her blog here, YouTube channel here, Instagram here) has shed the light on this important issue. Yes, she’s not the first to do so, but she created a tag and encouraged her blogger/vlogger friends, and others to share things they hide from social media.

It’s easy to think that someone’s life is perfect by just looking through their feed. It’s also important to know that people don’t share as much of their downs as they do their ups. The picture perfect post has been carefully planned to look like it does. The “perfect” beach body picture has been retouched, the angle has been chosen carefully, and there’s a lot of flexing and sucking in (most times).

I wanted to share this post before I start sharing photos on my Instagram and blog post about my fashion week trip. Because those photos won’t show you how anxious I am. They won’t show you how exhausted I might be. They won’t show you the hard work it took me to get here, nor the hundreds of emails I sent out. They won’t show you how unmotivated I was just a couple of weeks ago when I got ZERO replies, or when I doubted myself. They will only show you the good parts.

Top similar, cardigan similar, jeans Topshop, bag Gucci, shoes Forever21

A few months back I shared a series of funny behind the scenes photos (see it here) to remind you all: a) to take things more lightly, b) the pictures that get posted have been very carefully selected.

Remember that people put out their best on their platforms, and usually keep the negative aspects private. No one has a happy perfect life, we all have our ups and downs, and you’re not alone! Don’t compare yourself to anyone else, just be the best possible version of you!

XoXo,

Tamara

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88 Comments

  1. February 8, 2017 / 4:59 am

    Oh, dear Tamara, these tips are great! I see you know how to pose in the perfect way and I really like your look, too!
    xx from Bavaria/Germany, Rena
    http://www.dressedwithsoul.com

    • February 14, 2017 / 9:18 am

      Thank you Rena!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

  2. February 8, 2017 / 5:38 am

    This is such an important message and wonderful post. This is so true, and I admire the bloggers who put these real feelings and realizations out there. I know I am so so hard on myself and blogging has only made this more intense. Seeing full body photos can really make us focus on every flaw, and it can become overwhelming if we let it. Thanks so much for sharing this. You always look stunning, and knowing you feel the same way I do about this is extremely comforting. Thank you!
    XO! Gina
    http://www.classyeverafterblog.com

    • February 14, 2017 / 9:20 am

      We all feel insecure on our skin sometimes, but we should all know that we are beautiful in our way! I hope you won’t be sp hard on yourself anymore gorgeous !

      XoXo,

      Tamara

    • February 14, 2017 / 9:21 am

      I’m glad you enjoyed it Rachel.

      XoXo,

      Tamara

  3. February 8, 2017 / 6:31 am

    I love that not only do you talk about this, but you show the examples, too, Tamara!!
    Even when I have a good photo—I’m always trying to remember that it’s only a 2-D representation of what I’m wearing. It may look better or worse in person!!
    Thanks for this! (although your bad ones, would be considered my good ones—LOL!!)
    jodie
    http://www.jtouchofstyle.com

    • February 14, 2017 / 9:22 am

      I totally agree with you Jodie, it’s only a picture at the end of the day!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

  4. February 8, 2017 / 7:10 am

    Such a great post! I love this! It’s so true! I have so many pics too that aren’t flattering! You are being so genuine and I LOVE it!
    xoxo, Vanessa
    http://www.WhatWouldVWear.com

    • February 14, 2017 / 9:22 am

      Thank you Vanessa!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

  5. February 8, 2017 / 7:15 am

    Thank you, Tamara for speaking out about this and more awareness needs to be brought to the attention as the pressure of having the ‘perfect life’ is higher than ever especially for teenagers who are not aware that YouTube, Twitter, Blogs and all the social medias are just an illusion.

    Shireen | Reflection of Sanity

    • February 14, 2017 / 9:24 am

      So true Shireen and I agree with you, it affects younger people more!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

    • February 14, 2017 / 9:24 am

      Thank you for stopping by Jeanelly!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

    • February 14, 2017 / 9:25 am

      I’m glad you liked it Subomi!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

    • February 14, 2017 / 9:25 am

      Thanks for stopping by Neha!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

    • February 14, 2017 / 9:26 am

      Thank you Rachael!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

  6. February 8, 2017 / 10:49 am

    Ha, loved this post! I’d rather not share my unflattering poses those because I look way worse than you in yours! You’re so photogenic, babe!

    xoxo from Napa Valley!

    Paulina
    http://www.shenska.com

    • February 14, 2017 / 9:26 am

      You always look gorgeous babe!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

    • February 14, 2017 / 9:26 am

      Haha we should form a club!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

  7. February 8, 2017 / 11:14 am

    This is an amazing post, my friend! Everything you’ve mentioned is so spot on and I think it’s so cool that you’ve shown your readers what goes on behind the scenes editing process to select the beautifully images shared. Also, you go girl for being such a hustler, it was worth it in the end and you will have an amazing time at NYFW! I hope you’re having a wonderful day so far, beauty!

    XO,

    Jalisa
    http://www.thestylecontour.com

    • February 14, 2017 / 9:36 am

      Thank you Jalisa!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

  8. February 8, 2017 / 11:19 am

    That’s so true, I love what you said! I can spend a lot of time trying to make a flattering pose , if you know how many shots I’m to taking!

    http://violettedaily.com

    • February 14, 2017 / 6:11 pm

      We’re all in the same boat!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

    • February 14, 2017 / 6:11 pm

      Thank you for stopping by Mahi!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

  9. February 8, 2017 / 3:41 pm

    Absolutely true! You got the point! Thank you for the heads up!

    • February 14, 2017 / 6:29 pm

      You’re welcome Ellie!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

  10. February 8, 2017 / 4:30 pm

    So true – for one good photo there are about 25 that were hilariously bad when my husband takes my picture! xo, Biana –BlovedBoston

    • February 14, 2017 / 6:13 pm

      Same here Biana!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

  11. February 9, 2017 / 12:37 am

    Thank you for this post, I often stare with envy at fashion posts that I could never look that flawless and stylish. Behind the scenes posts like this remind me of the editing that can go into all these posts, you still look amazing in the pictures though 🙂

    Rosy | Sparkles of Light Blog
    My Instagram | Instagram

    • February 14, 2017 / 6:14 pm

      Nobody looks flawless in real life. We all have “flaws” and they’re what make us different and beautiful!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

    • February 14, 2017 / 6:14 pm

      Thanks!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

    • February 14, 2017 / 6:14 pm

      Thank you Gemma!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

  12. February 9, 2017 / 6:41 am

    Beautiful post and you are so strong to share this! You are absolutely right about this and I think it is very important you let your followers know how bloggers do it..! Love your bag btw! Big Xx Susanne – http://bagatyou.com

    • February 14, 2017 / 6:15 pm

      Thank you Susanne!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

    • February 14, 2017 / 6:15 pm

      You’re welcome Chanel!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

  13. Siffat Haider
    February 9, 2017 / 11:38 am

    Oh this post is too true. I have the funniest outtakes of myself from shoots. You also look super chic 🙂
    xo
    Siffat
    http://icingandglitter.com

    • February 14, 2017 / 6:15 pm

      Thanks Siffat!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

    • February 14, 2017 / 6:29 pm

      You’re welcome Clare!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

  14. Neha
    February 9, 2017 / 1:40 pm

    love this post ! very true and a much needed reality check for everyone from time to time to only take social media portrayal with a pinch of salt.

    -Neha
    LovePlayingDressup

    • February 14, 2017 / 6:30 pm

      I’m glad you agree Neha!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

    • February 14, 2017 / 6:30 pm

      You’re welcome Nicky!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

  15. February 9, 2017 / 5:06 pm

    Such a clever post!! If only people knew how many bad shots there are to just get that one good one 🙂 Hope you have a good weekend!

    Shauna

    http://www.lipglossandlace.net

    • February 14, 2017 / 6:32 pm

      Hopefully now they know!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

    • February 14, 2017 / 6:33 pm

      Hehe we’re all the same Julia!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

    • February 14, 2017 / 6:33 pm

      I’m glad you do Kelly!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

  16. February 10, 2017 / 7:51 am

    It’s so true babe, people doesn’t know that we took hundreds of pics for only selecting a few to our social media, love your post! ♥

    http://www.heresometimes.com

    • February 14, 2017 / 6:33 pm

      Hopefully now they know the truth!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

  17. February 10, 2017 / 8:11 am

    I love that you also shed light on this! I think you’re one of the few bloggers I know that genuinely talks about it in a post and don’t mention it only in a few lines in a random post. So hands down to you for doing it!

    And all the love and good luck at the fashion week, hope you’ll enjoy it too!! Xx
    http://www.thefashionfolks.com

    • February 14, 2017 / 6:34 pm

      Thank you girl! I think more and more influencers should do the same!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

  18. February 10, 2017 / 9:16 am

    Great tips!!

  19. February 10, 2017 / 12:04 pm

    This is an amazing, honest post babe! Its so great that you introduced this topic of what often goes unnoticed in the world of blogging and fashion 🙂 Hope you have a wonderful weekend love!

    XO Jessi,
    http://www.mywhitet.com/nyfw-day-1-recap/

    • February 14, 2017 / 6:36 pm

      Thank you Jessi!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

    • February 14, 2017 / 6:36 pm

      Thank you Hadasah!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

    • February 14, 2017 / 6:37 pm

      Thank you!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

    • February 14, 2017 / 6:37 pm

      You’re welcome Kathrine!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

  20. February 11, 2017 / 10:15 pm

    This is such a great idea for a post and a tag and I’ve done something similar before. it’s so easy to hide things in photos, even if all you do is select the ‘best’ ones from a few. There is even more you could do with photoshop. It’s important, like you said, to not compare. Never compare your behind the scenes to someone else’s highlight reel 🙂

    Hope you are having a great weekend 🙂

    Away From The Blue Blog

    • February 14, 2017 / 6:39 pm

      I’m so glad you enjoyed this blog Mica!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

    • February 14, 2017 / 6:40 pm

      We all have those bad photos!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

  21. February 12, 2017 / 9:58 pm

    I love this post because it is so true, after I have my photos taken I look at all of the images and find so many funny and useless photos. Very brave of you to actually post them. The outfit is so cute!

    Camila,
    My Vogue Style | http://www.mvyoguestyle.com

    • February 14, 2017 / 6:40 pm

      Thank you Camila!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

  22. February 13, 2017 / 7:05 am

    You always keep it so real & I love that-LOL we’ve all been there too-I can really relate.

    Happy Monday, girlie!

    Katelyn/www.theyellowspectacles.com

    • February 14, 2017 / 6:41 pm

      I’m glad you do Katelyn!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

  23. February 13, 2017 / 3:25 pm

    Such an inspiring post! Being present in the digital media, we will always see negative words about us, about what we do, but we just need to either improve or ignore.
    Lovely outfit by the way, I love the jeans!

    http://thewonderfashion.blogspot.com

    • February 14, 2017 / 6:43 pm

      So true Lola!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

    • February 14, 2017 / 6:43 pm

      Thank you Eva!

      XoXo,

      Tamara

  24. February 14, 2017 / 6:44 pm

    We all have them and nobody is perfect.

    XoXo,

    Tamara

  25. February 15, 2017 / 8:58 am

    This is such a great idea! I have plenty of photos like the ones on the left haha.

    Jamie
    Treats and Trends

  26. February 15, 2017 / 11:33 am

    What a great post. It’s so true what you say. Loving seeing the difference in your pics. Although I quite like the first one on the left! But hey. X

  27. Maria
    February 23, 2017 / 11:41 am

    Great post!! I agree with you 100 percent!! Sometimes I post my outtakes or just funny photos. I think that people have to know how hard it is to be a blogger…

    My Fashion BLOG by Maria

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